Angel

Disclaimer: I don’t own Kingdom of Heaven. It belongs to Sir Ridley Scott and William Monahan.

Heaven and Earth; the only difference is the relations between one person and another. In Heaven, no hate exists. It is foreign. I do not claim to know everything that there is to know about Heaven, nor do I know everything worth knowing about Earth. I just know more than most of you.

 

I have existed in both realms. I have seen the peace of Heaven and the bloodshed on Earth. I have seen men create paradise on Earth, and I have seen other men turn that paradise into Hell. Time passes, but human nature does not change.

 

I was sent down from Heaven with a mission.

 

No, I am not the Messiah, nor have I ever claimed to be.

 

As I have said, I was sent down to do God’s work, and my task was to give guidance to one who bore the mark of God; the problem was that he did not know it.

 

Men are strange creatures. The Truth is right before their eyes, in all its different incarnations, but most of the time, they are oblivious to it. They seem to like to convolute the simplest of things, warping God’s will with man-made rules and dogmas. There are those who believe they are doing God’s work by sticking strictly to their dogmas, when in actual fact, they go against His decrees when they discriminate against those who do not believe in their rules. They claim to love God and obey His commands when they preach hatred against their fellow men. Mankind has a way of distinguishing between one another using the smallest of differences, even though they have more similarities. They seek to exaggerate those differences. Perhaps it is in their nature to want to find others who are exactly the same. I do not completely understand it, and I do not think that I ever will. It is a funny business. Amongst them, it is easy to hide, for they cannot see anything that they do not believe, and no one believes that angels walk with men.

 

It made sense to appear as a brother of one of the many holy orders. No one asked about the origins of a knight of the Hospital. He was a knight and a monk; nothing else mattered. I stayed in Messina. A Heaven for some; Hell for others.

 

Sicily was a place where Christians and Muslims existed together; not always in harmony, but they survived for a few centuries alongside one another. What had you expected? They lived in intolerant times. It was in Sicily that I first met Godfrey, or rather, I first sought him out.

 

You see, certain men have a certain air about them. I could feel that Godfrey was important to my mission. He was an easy man to become acquainted with; open hearted and generous, he was not one who rejected strangers, and certainly not a stranger who was a knight of the Hospital. Godfrey had great respect for the Order, for obvious reasons.

 

We became great friends, and he allowed me to glimpse a brighter future for mankind; a future in which Earth became as Heaven was. Godfrey was like that; always full of hopeful ideals, even if most of them were not pragmatic. Still, it was good to see them. Perhaps one day they will manifest. Today is not that day, it seems. When you open the newspapers, the first thing you see is bloodshed.

 

Ah, pardon me. I am going off on a tangent. Yes, I knew that Godfrey would lead me on towards my task, and I followed him. The reckless man often went astray, but I turned a blind eye to those acts. I was not God; it was not my right to judge.

 

It took a great many years, but I had faith, both in my mortal friend and in God. They did not fail me, for after a long time, Godfrey did finally lead me to what I was looking for. I was just not expecting it.

 

A blacksmith. Godfrey sought him. I sought him. He was a pitiable figure the first time I saw him, but the more I observed him, the more I became aware of his strength. Grief surrounded young Balian like a shroud around a corpse when I first met him. His world was grey, and yet, the light was right before him.

 

At first, I was not aware that this was my charge. The night after I saw him, God marked him out for the world to see. It was a cross, burned onto the palm of his hand. See? Angels can be blind sometimes as well, and taking the form of a man makes us less intuitive than usual. Perhaps God had hidden Balian from the world, waiting to reveal his identity at exactly the right time. The Almighty works in mysterious ways; not even angels can understand Him.

 

Balian was one of the many chosen to bring peace. It was like a seed buried in his soul. He had to be taught. My task was to nurture that seed so that it would bear fruit. It was so easy for these young ones to go astray. So I did teach him, and he was a willing learner. Like his father before him, he strayed at times, but he always knew when he had gone too far. I led him as if he was a child, guiding him, and at the same time, making him feel as if he was realizing the Truth all by himself. I could not let him know of what I really was.

 

The time came when my task was finished. Balian was ready to do what the Almighty had meant for him to do, and it was time for me to leave. How could I have left without rousing his suspicion, you wonder, for Balian was an intelligent man. He learned very quickly, and most things did not escape his notice, with the exception of his purpose in life.  

 

It was painful, yes, but it had to be done. It was God’s will. I rode off to war, never intending to return. Battle created Hell in Heaven. Crows wheeled overhead, cloaked in dark feathers like the minions of Lucifer. They cawed, telling us that we were all about to die. Seraphim I might be, but at that moment in time, I was the owner of a mortal body. A sword can do the same thing to any neck, whether the owner of the neck has an angelic soul or not.

 

My executioner stared down at me with intense dark eyes. He was probably wishing that I would convert, but that would ruin my mission. I had to leave, for it was time for Balian to walk without someone holding his hand. He was grown. He was complete. “You are going to die for your faith,” the man said to me in his native tongue. I glanced up at him and smiled. There was no fear, for fear did not exist in Heaven, and I was going home.

 

“I know,” I told him, calmly nodding my head. The blow was quick. There was a burst of pain, and then I was free. The gates of Heaven opened for me, and I was beside my Lord again.

 

Oh yes, Balian grieved for me, and it pained me to cause him more sorrow, for I had grown to love him. Yet, we were not parted, for I was with him. He held my teachings in his heart, and he had become the man I had intended him to be, and perhaps more, even. It is not usual for one of my kind to feel pride —humility is a virtue which we Seraphim are supposed to have, you see— but I was proud when he gave up his reputation and his life for the greater good. He brought temporary peace to a war torn land by offering himself up as sacrifice, and God spared him, just as He had spared Isaac.

 

Of course, one Balian was not enough to maintain peace. He might have been chosen, but all mortals expired. He was no exception. I saw him pass through the gates of Heaven and welcomed by those who had gone before him. It was time for him to come home, for that was where all the bringers of peace belonged. Heaven was part of their inheritance.

 

So, now you have heard my story. Do not look so surprised. Surely you must have known that my kind, the messengers of the Almighty, are always watching. I could be the policeman in the corner, keeping an eye on the traffic, or that old lady who is giving money to that homeless man. I might be that imam in the mosque who is preaching peace. I could be the soldier who refuses to take up arms for an unjust cause. My kind has always been here with you, and we will always be.

 

Who knows? Perhaps one day, I will find another Balian, another bringer of peace, and once again, it will be my task to train him. The Almighty is always looking for those who can make the world a better place, and He does not discriminate. Religion does not matter to him, nor do any other affiliations. He only wants those whose hearts are pure. Perhaps it is you. Perhaps it is your little nephew who gets in everyone’s way when he tries to help. The signs are everywhere, before your eyes. You just have to watch for them.